www.CostaRicaTicas.com

Yea, does she even love you dude?



Cujo

_________________
"Pain is the fuel that fans the flames of my pyre. A battle plan is only as good as the general carrying it out on the field. This is my war son, and I have the biggest bombs and the smallest conscience"...

Only you know the situation between you and her.

Bennett.....

If I may ask, what do you (and she) have in mind to do married that you can't do unmarried ?

The legal question intrigued me, so I hit google, lots of stuff, suggest you do the same. In short my conclusion from the info was that if you're legally married in CR, the US will recognzie the marriage as long as it is recorded, first there and then probably in your home state, a state may have a different approach, so check out your state. As far as money in the bank, you'd have plenty of time to deal with that, but do you really think she's going to go thru all of that to get at that? Unless there's alot of money, not many Tico or Gringo lawyers are going to jump thru those burdensome int'l law hoops to get a bank to honor a foreign jurisdictcion court's subpoena or freeze order without a big pot of gold. So, asset protection if you are in that category. Marital property under American law is anything you acquire after the marriage, accept for gifts or inheritance, generally speaking, but that becomes marital if you commingle it or your pre-marital stuff with her, eg, you put it in a joint account or you buy a house in both names with that money, now you may have commingled. Don't know about CR law but I'd think it is not going to be in your favor. Yolu may be wise to consult with a family law abogado with an eye toward a pre-nup with terms acceptable in CR jurisprudence. Here they are generally: Complete disclosure of assets, both sides had their own attorney, and the terms can't be "unconscionable", no clue about CR. All in all, a slippery slope if you have or will be acquiring substantial assets during the marriage, and alot depending on where you get divorced. Your pre-nup can probably specify that the laws of which ever jurisdiction are more favorable to you is the applicable law to be applied even if it is in CR--not sure.

Why not just support as you would if you were married? That should cool her jets. Anyone know the success rate of long distance love affairs with infrequent consortium? I've done it a few times with Ticas, 2-4 years. The difficulties eventually outweigh the benefits and/or the "love" takes too many hits from a variety of psycho-social events and so it dies a natural death.

Spend his money more liberally.

People tend to exagerate when it comes to people taking advantage of the gringo. I had a problem with a chica before and just assumed if she caused cops or tried to cause trouble for me I would automatically be the loser. I have always relied on solid referrals in the States, so started talking with a gringo friend who is a lawyer down here. He is corporate but is well connected. He said I don't automatically go to jail if a chica just wants some revenge. He said that is just a by product of having a bad lawyer, of which there are many down here. Luckily, I never had to test it. BUT, a recommendation of a lawyer from him to a buddy of mine worked out well. He had to take his ex-wife to court because of erratic behavior, threats and obstructing his right to freely see his K*D. And he won. I think they would nail you to the wall down here to get Ch*ld support, but I don't think they are going to give a chica half of your assets after a few years marriage. And if I had to bet money, I would say they would never be able to get to assets in the States, with no Ch*ldren involved.

i dont doubt that what Thirdworld says is true, for whom he is referring, that things CAN work out that way. which is quite a bit rose colored glasses for me.

i also have been through risky situations and come out fine.

but the key is that you still must realize it is a RISKY situation of which you speak.

and i bet that if even TW tallies up the sum total of experiences to which he has been witness, that he would admit there is greater, by far, downside risk to your getting married.

and the downside is potentially a huge downside.

Preaching to the choir here, never been married. Earlier go for it posts were somewhat sarcastic. Sorry, hadn't had enough coffee. BUT, in last post was just posting about the exaggerations that go around on this forum. Kind of a "they are all out to get us in the country" mentality. I have heard many stories of woe and inquired a bit about their attorneys. When you get the equivalent of a strip mall attorney in any country, you are tempting fate. Hell, I do agree with you. Would never marry here, unless it was a totally what I consider "normal" situation. Meet the girl, get to know her over a year or 2. Know the family and make sure they are a family that I would want to marry into in any culture. Not a pack of wolves looking for an ATM. If you date in the gutter of course you are gonna be a target. Despite my cynicism at times, I have quite a few friends with happy marriages. Alas, most of the guys have never been around the gulch though.

I appreciate all the responses and different views! I have read of the woes of Rolltide! Poor guy!! I have been visiting CR for around 5 years, thus I am kind of savy to the exploits.
Been with this girl for a year now and have many ups and downs, as in any relationship.
We do share an apt at present, I do pay all the bills. My timeline for moving to CR is the first of the year!
Seems as if the concenus is that she would have no claim to any assets earned before the marriage and would have a hard time getting to them. I do agree that to mention these points is a huge downer but after being a member of this board for years, one would be crazy not to simply ask questions! I believe that I will hold off for the time being and address this when I actually am there full time.
Thanks guys!!

If this was the law in the U.S very few men would marry a woman with Ch*ldren.

As far as your money? I HOPE you didn't tell her what you have. I would talk to a U.S attorney about how to hide your money. Maybe mom's bank account? 401k?

6 months is way, way too soon to make a commitment when you only spend limited time with her. If you get her pregnant, get a paternity test please.

Road goes both ways
It seems to Bennett wants to marry Tica so that he can get permanant residency to CR so that he can stay there indefinately without hassle of 3 mths entry/exit rule .

Tica wants to marry Bennett so that she can have comfy secured life and US passport

Nonworking novia tica knows that Bennett is basically a monger ( they all know ) but is still willing to marry him. Go figure

--->> This would be a marriage of convenience. Win-Win situation. Get pre-nup and don't make any babi.es and you are good

Goodluck

I completely agree with TW concerning the rate of gringo victimization. But I don't agree gringos are the signiticant factor for ticas getting pregnant out of wedlock in CR. There is plenty of this going around without the help of the Gringo.

I do think there is a better than even money that the Tica in question (and her family) are looking to capitalize on this scenario. I also agree with TW, that this is easier said than done when push comes to shove. It's usally the Gringo who puts himself in a situation where he would consider himself to be exploited. But that is the nature of the game. It is kinda a natural progression for the Gringo to get in to deep in these situations:

You get married, you need to take care of your wife, you dont want her to live like and impoverished Tica, she's your wife. Now she is pregnant. Your not going to abandon your K*ds (if they are yours), you can't let them live like impoverish ticos..

Dont forget that once he is married her mother become his mother-in-law and you can let her go to some crappy national health insurance doctor when she is sick.

I think it would be foolhearty to think that assume this isn't the agenda by the Tica and family, especially if she is pressuring him to get married.

The nature of the generally generous Gringo makes this scenario typical, the long term success of the marriage another q.

Just by:

Reading your posts on this thread
Visiting CR for 15 years and 40 trips
Having a brain as well as some common sense

Cutting through all the BS, just don't do it - I know nothing about you; we have never met - but if I had to draw a picture, just from a couple of your posts and the (little) info shared here, I'd conclude the following:

There is likely what most would deem huge age disparity between the parties
Truth be told, she has (or has had) some involvement in the sex industry
You are not similar in background (obviously; you are not a tico) nor education level
You have huge fights and then get back together, w/ multiple break up's - clue for you - strong relationships with mature parties most certainly do not have "many up's and downs" - especially over silly, stupid things that if you were completly honest (w/ yourself, never mind others) you would conclude most of the "issues" and arguements were
The strongest bond you have is a good sex - she is probably the hottest, youngest, girl you have ever dated
You question whether you want to spend the rest of your life with this person (the theme of your question)
She has Ch*ldren with an other(s) partner; probably in an unmarried relationship
You conducted the relationship long distance and as of right now, for all of the relationship, you were not resident in CR
You view her family as present/future moochers
After a short time - a year all in - you are feeling pressure to be married, so much that you threw this open to guys you don't know for advice
You talk of protecting your assets first and foremost
Your words - "If you cave and marry her..." Do you realize how that sums it all up - marrage should not be something you "cave" - should be a well thought out plan between 2 parties in love who also share common goals and asperations - Jusus, its not all that difficult, and its not rocket science - just a little common sense

I'll let the romantics and other morons keep their own opinons - but if I'm even partly correct in what I've written, you need to rethink the marrage and possibly the whole relationship - but you know that, don't you

haha Scuba1, that one should probably be made into a sticky! Actually, it should be made into an official document that must be signed by any gringo marrying down here. Sort of a disclaimer you have to sign to say that you understand the risks.